TMF

My lesson for today: (and every day)
Love is eternal, ever present, not limited by body and form; the universe is one love. As we live and are present in it, we are in love, are loved, are made and supported by love. No person changes, adds or detracts from that love. They simply open our eyes to see it and open our hearts to feel it. If we live with an open heart, we live in love. Each day is a love embrace, a love emergence and love immersion.

Today I will live in love.

To My Friends

Chrystinedrums.com

Contact Chrystine

I was living on a sunny day until the clouds came. Deep shadows floating on the ground. The air smelled of rain. Their tears fall and soak me to my inner most garments, the ones few others ever see. The wind tatters and rips away my coat, tares my dress and then all else. I am left naked and exposed. I looked for shelter but found no home, no cave or no hole. The old familiar hiding places were piles of rubble or filled with bones. I shower in the tears, cleans the smelly and sacred spots. Slowly the clouds moved on. The grass greener, the leaves sparkling with the lingering drops. I look at growing things I've never seen though they had obviously flourished for years. Upon a branch hangs a robe prepared sometime before. It is embroidered with gold and purple patterns that I do not yet understand. But, I walk wrapped in comfort.

As the wind's song sings, I dance.

As I drop into a sleep, I awaken in a world of shifting streams, conscious of consciousness. What is firm and solid may not be. I open my eyes and dream a day of peace, a peace conceived in ecstatic, enduring love. As if constrained, contained by hardness, an egg. Life lives within the shell, but it is meant to be something more. So I warm the love and hold it close. Endure the day of cracking, breaking, when the new place and the new phase are born.

Walking on eggshells, I step softly through my day.

I am amazed at the response I have received to these pieces. They have been called stunning, breathtaking, beautiful and powerful, inspired, insightful, sensuaally delisious, deep and profound. They have repeatedly been likened to the writings of a contemporary Rumi.

I am forced to admit, they are written with intent that is malicious and mischievous. If you are not careful, they will sneak up and untie your heart, leaving you exposed to the flow of universal love. Accepting such things is insane. Risking your sanity for the sake of love is craziness, divinely blissful craziness. You have been warned. Read on at your own risk.

Love is not meant for the rational mind. It is only at home in an open heart. Wherever your heart goes your mind will eventually follow. My advice is to not believe anything you read in these pages. My personal mission is not to believe it, but rather to live being it. What you will read in these pages is that quest.

The first piece is titled My Lesson for Today. That is the key to all the others. Everything comes from or ends there. I am not a learned sage. I am just a learner enrolled in the school of love. I have no source of special truth. I simply stand in the light and let it cast these shadows. If you follow the shadows to their source, you will find the light. I hope you get a deep tan.

Once upon a time, I found a love that was.
It was what I wanted to be.
Once upon a time, I found a love that does.
It does the dusting of my soul.

Once upon a time, I found a love that heals.
It heals my ancient wounds.
Once upon a time, I found a love that's real.
It is so real to feel reality.

Once upon a time I found a love that lives.
It lives in all that is.
Once upon a time, I found a love that is.
It is here.

Once upon a time, is today.

For a long time there was no sparkle in the sky, just the knowledge that it had once been there. Hope filled my heart with a hunger for a moon that filled with light. I long again to walk unaided across the rocks, navigate around the brush. But morning does come after a clouded new moon night. The foggy layer will dissipate and the sun will leave a warm glow on my face. Until then I warm over a hot dark brew, mourning comfort. The cup empties its warmth into my soul. But even there, the grounds on the bottom cause me to spit, as it ends. I'll hope not for the moon today, I'll push into the sun's glow.

If there is no comfort in the night, I'll walk within the light.

I stood in the comfort of my shadows for a while, ignoring the movements on the floor. I contented myself to think I had all that I could ever want, hidden with and within me. Discomfort grew as it always does. It left me little room. I stepped from the edge into the light of dancing colors, an unseen weaver's work. The weaving had gone astray. Yarns needed to be pulled and reworked. They tugged my heart and pulled me in uneasy ways. Then the new dance began, to the music of a new band. The threads of colors changed, new threads and lights added to the mix. They swayed over, in between, under, a perfect tapestry was in hand.

A work in process, I am woven by the dance.

The fruit of worldly love, ripened, sweetened then its juice turned to wine. It intoxicated, confused and filled my mind. I stumbled in a stupor, and ignored so much more. My head was filled with hallucinations of passion, of meanings and drunken understandings. There was joy and celebration as I lay puking on the floor. That wine runs dry and winds my mind around its empty flask. I want so much to find a drunkenness that lasts. So I turn to an unworldly fruit, an ecstasy that endures. I drink the wine of divine grapes, always sweet, with no morning after pain. The figments of its fermentation are real and firm. This bottle never empties. I sing drunkard's songs, lost within the verse, wandering the earth.

Should we ever meet, I will offer you a drink.

May your heart always be warmed by the fire of love

Chrystine

Other writings by Chrystine. Thoughts, Reflections and Musings.

Other writings by Chrystine Thoughts, Reflections and Musings

What is the nature of love, what is divine? My mind tells me that it needs to know but my heart kneads the dough and bakes the bread of love. My feet say they need to go, to move and progress. My heart says relax. This is a time of rest. Renew and grow instead of go, and go, and go. What do I know? I must wait as this loaf bakes. Stoke the fire with tattered furnishing of the past. It may be that a miracle will descend onto the earth and find the hearth of my soul. As the timer calls, my oven opens, and I find a cake in that loaf's place.

When that day comes, I will share among my friends.

Within the light what is
is
there is no matter as to the matter
of the matter
it is
alone
in all complete

As it is
it is perfect
as is all that is
if you must wonder
as to its purpose
be filled
with the wonder not the purpose

alone
in all complete

Purpose is form
wonder is essence
and experience
wonderment is
as all that is
alone
in all complete

Stored for me many years ago the mystery unfolds

As we passed on some astral street, I saw your heart today. I heard your beauty in its beat. Eyes may be the windows of your soul, but rhythm is its door. A cadence of love sets the pace and synchronizes the column of emotions trekking the hike of peace, marching away from war. May you always keep step with love.

Thank you for passing my way.

Today I light a candle and draw a bath. Stripped to the flesh, I throw my old clothes on a pyre. My skin aches for the warming whirlpool of love. I slide into the tub, so warm, no, so hot, the lobster in a pot. At first I recoil but sit tight knowing I will adjust. Light swirls around with force and loosens the crust. A hand rubs me with a stiff brush. Washing away the ages of dirt, mud and dust. The pulsing massaging my aches, I begin to relax, but then shock when the cleansing does not stop. My skin itself begins to flake. It looks so old floating away. Next my muscles melt and the marrow and the bone. I am no more the body that I've known. The light filters and clears and becomes a pool of white. I look to find my self, hoping I have not drowned. My skeleton is brilliance, and my flesh and muscle layer light upon light. I am bathing in the tub of love as it cleans and renews.

I will rest in this bath, until the process is through.

I wanted to play in the game of love. I'd watched it for years and thought it looked like fun. I bought all the right equipment, the best-insulated suit and looked for a book of rules. The store appeared to be sold out. How could I be expected to play if I didn't know the boundaries? How can I know how far to go? Will others know not to hit me too hard, after all I'm new. How do you play a game if you don't know the rules? So I made up my own list of conditions that would keep me safe, or so I thought. That's when I met the ref, these sorts of rules require official review. I watched as the first was lined through, the second was erased and the third was blotted out, and the process continued to the end. In case they would be of any use, I give you my regulations that survived the scrutiny.
(This space has by intent and divine intervention been left blank)

I play on the field of unconditional love.

I had a dream that I was made into a box. I was stored in some small but special space. Flanked by beings from another realm, protected, I waited. Within was the agreement between the divine and me. On my lid lay an offering of prayer. A trumpet blew and a voice announced this was the holy of holy days. A light descended onto my prayers and absorbed them. Then it penetrated my walls and pushed deep within. It burned without consuming. With the divine agreement as a mold, it melted and reshaped my heart. I was ready for the light to ascend and leave me in the dark again, but it lingered. It compressed into a liquid and oozed into my new heart. I feel it swish with each beat and surge with each breath. I awaken.

I stretch feeling different. May this be a holy of holy days.

One question, there is only one that matters.
There is one question that means everything. Each path is different. People hold their own piece of wisdom. You may never ask this of another, ask and answer only to yourself. Being willing to ask the question, as well as what you answer will reveal your soul, your destiny and the progress on your path. To learn the secret of this question is to know all that is, to be filled, content and complete. With every day you ask again and again. When you know the right answer before you ask, you have achieved all there is to know and do in one lifetime. Tonight as your mind pulls up its anchor, just before you are set adrift on the waves of dreams, ask yourself the question. Make no query of who or where or what. Simply ask how did I love today? Excuse me if I end this with immediacy, but there is someone waiting to see me.

There is an important question I need to ask her.

A little less of the esoteric and poetic this time, at least I'll try. I recently had someone give back a heart I'd given them. It just seemed inappropriate to keep anymore. O. K., so it is a metaphor. I wore my heart where all could see it today. After all, my heart has been what this is all about, I am proud to let it show. In the middle of my day I was surprised when someone looked me square in the chest and said, "Wow, what a beautiful heart! I have never seen anything like it." Were they looking only at the luminous glass bobble, or was it reflecting more than office light? I didn't ask for clarification, I just walked away in quiet bliss. It is such a great comfort and blessing to hear those words. History tells us that when a great king looked for a champion, he was advised by his creator to look at the candidate not as man sees him but as God does, look at his heart. For a moment I will borrow the heavenly spectacles. Within my mind I see your light and form as I say to you...

Wow, what a beautiful heart!

I am such a fool for love, an idiot in search of a village. I wish for a place to live that will provide comfort and security, but my home is the search, the path. I abandon reason as a guide. Such a fool I am. My foolishness is not naivete. As I leave behind my mind and reason I make room for unusual and wonder filled love. My mind is so small. It holds so few things. The love is so great and fills up all that space and overflows to fill the earth. Such a fool I am. I fill buckets from the flood of love and carry them from there to here, pour them out and fill them again.

A vagabond jester, I juggle many things.

I am at a boarding school where the rules are tough. There are no breaks, vacations, holidays or days off. Everyday is filled with classes, study, practice and homework. The books come in many colors, shapes and languages. The library walks around in various types of clothes. I wander the campus among students, teachers, and lessons. I may have a private tutor when the curriculum gets really rough. Few register, but everyone attends. This school never recruits, just hangs a shingle out.

The sign reads School of Love, inquire within.

I am just back from taking a walk through rarely visited places in my heart. It was not an easy trip. So sad to see much had been ignored and become run down. The streets were pitted with potholes and in major disrepair. I cried from the pain of getting there. Then I filled roll after roll of paper sheets soaking up the flood of the broken tear pipes. There are so many feelings attached to the homes, the gardens, and the folk still hanging round. I knew just where I needed to head, down the hill a little farther and turn left. That is where my poet lives. She is my best confidant and friend. She carries wisdom as a snack, feeds the beast with her delight, and carries love in a golden sack. I had missed her sweet and soothing voice, nearly forgotten the gentle and profound embrace. I wanted her to stay with me, but this is where she is most at ease. She enjoys the visits to my place on top the knoll, but it is too hazardous and harsh for a gentle soul. She loves so much to dance among the shadows. She has all her comforts, a lamp to let her see, and an eternal fire for warmth. I am making out a plan to repair the road, make it easier for us to visit. I can go to her or she can come see me. I'll find the time to visit there, but insist she stays longer here, when she can.

There is no more important road than the one that leads to an old friend.

I went searching for the shape of love and found a circle instead of a heart. The heart is like a balloon that takes on its true figure when filled. Limp and lifeless it still has color and appeal, because you know what it can be. Fill it from your lungs and it bounces on the floor. Filled with something lighter than air, like the wind of love, the breath of God and it will soar.

Expanding with love, my heart rises today.

Last Update 1/21/06

As you wander through the market, beware. Beware of those with secrets to see or share, for a price. They will whisper about a hidden treasure. They will promise to take you there. They are the blessed, to be shown the way. Somehow they look divinely better than you, be wary. You are the keeper of the secret. It was written on the parchment of your soul so long ago, before you were even born. There is no code. It is the language you have always known. Come dance and sing, in divine drunken ecstasy and you will see. With this intoxication, there is no forgetfulness. It awakens the remembrance.

Step into this dance and remember.

It was a pregnant pause. Tears poured from some unknown place. They reddened, twisted and swelled my face. So I asked, why, what was this process? Why is it not easy to simply let go? Why is it not simple to easily let go? The answer stood beside me. Rooted firm in the earth, a tree. It sheds the old that is confining growth. Its bark split and peeled in layers. It took the form of a ripping yawning yani giving birth. Now I know.

For the joy of new life I push, push and push through the pain.

There is light shining in your eyes
Within this sacred and holy space
There is warmth radiating in your soul
That I feel in your embrace

Throw open the curtains of your heart
Look at the landscape of love
It invites you to adventure past
Known horizons, below and above

Unlatch the lock, open the door and explore

Our hearts reach to each other, between the divine and me. There are strings attached, there are things. In my heart there is no space for hurt, there is only home for love. Within is the chamber of forgetting and of dreams. I lose what is real and dream realities. I envision the world full of love. Our hearts breathe, as our lungs need the air. We search for what surrounds us, fills us and keeps us alive. Are we blue from holding the breath of our heart? Let it go, empty your heart and then draw a new breath. Accept the resuscitation, the kiss of life.

Breathe the life of love.

The light encountered me today. It needed to inquire. Where did you leave your laughter? Did you put it down to carry a heavy load? Have you forgotten where it sets? Look! Go look now to find a laugh. It is the key ring that opens your soul, releases the latch. Oh my dearest of dear ones, Laugh. So I started by looking on my face, that is always a funny place. I closed one eye, crossed the other and made a fish mouth kiss, put up my hands for wings. Picture an overweight, flying, and fishy poet that can't see where she is going.

Thank you for thinking about me today.

I am hungry. I watch as others prepare to share their pies and set them out to cool. The aroma, warmth and color of the oozing, sweet filling draws me, but I have not yet cleaned my plate. That syrup is still too hot. It would burn my heart. There will be desert, in time. For now I feed my soul, take the nourishment I am given. I enjoy the fruits, spices and the herbs that give this a delightful flavor, intriguing textures. It was prepared with generous portions of love, with care for what I need, on a table set in beauty. I came only to appease a hungering, and found I enjoy the feasting. I will eat until all that has been served is consumed.

May I never be full at the table of light.

The clothes we wear define us. Rich or poor, trendy, comfortable, we have our favorites. We think they make us feel good or look great. Clothing is such a magical thing. What would we be without our clothes, naked? We'd be vulnerable, exposed and something less. Everyone knows we are only our clothes, or are we? My lover whispers. I adore you in your dress of nakedness. So go to the closet of your soul. Many things hang there that no longer fit or are moth eaten, ragged old soul clothes. Throw them out. Better yet, burn them! Your creator is the seamstress of the universe. Prepare for the wardrobe she is making. They will fit soul tight, to show off your glorious form.

You look fabulous in so many colors, shine.

A magic mirror, I am hung on the wall of a hall. You pause near and then pass on. It seems you have been wired with fiber, strands that let the light of your heart shine through your smile and eyes. And they shine! You are a glow walking in my dim corridor. I am glowing with joy when you turn towards me. The brightness washes out detail. Within this glass the blemishes and wrinkles fade. I want you to love what you see.

Beauty is all I care to reflect: you make my job so easy.

I was afraid to go out, to love.There was a dragon named fear. She was living quite near my home. I avoided her for years. She threatened to destroy all I had known, all I had, and all I ever wanted. Most of the time she slept, but upon occasion she would quake and wake, belching fire that lit bushes and trees. She'd then roam about devouring all she found. I had no way to make her sleep forever. I could never slay such a huge beast. So I gathered my courage as she snored. I slipped a saddle on her and synched it tight. I climbed on and awakened her for a ride.

When you ride dragons, you fly.

I am a drop in the ocean of love. The river of life is flowing to me. I am lifted to float, am a billowy cloud. I am the rain of liquid love. The stream gives drink to life on the ground. The streams join to form the river of life flowing to the sea. And I become a drop in the ocean of love.

It was in the world
You made
I went for a walk
Just a day
I didn't know how
It would be
I wasn't watching
Someone sneaked up
And untied my heart
I tripped on a lace
And fell into love
I fell hard
And I doubt
I'll ever get up
I splashed
In a puddle
I float
I bob
And I drown
In you
I sink
And I doubt
I'll ever come up

My lover whispered today. Said there was a message left with you, for me, and told me I would find it on a table in the hall of your heart. I am reading it just now. Wow-wee! It says that I am loved, in a heavenly way. Thank you for bringing it to me. You are quite the message bearer and wisdom keeper.
Your heart often opens its wings to carry messages of love.

As I lay me down to sleep, I want you.
And I rest because you love me.
When I move in dreams, I meet you.
We walk together beside the streams.
When I awaken, you sparkle in my eyes.
I shower and am soaked with you.
As I dry, I am wrapped in peace.
I dress. I am covered in joy.
With each sip of my cup, I drink your love.

Because of you, my day ends and begins in love.

As I am still you fill crevice, niche and cubbyhole of my soul with the magical music of love. In the silence, I hear you singing, voicing a simple song complex in meaning. Transcending, my heart takes notes. My essence is affected by the infectious affection. Your melody invites my form to dance, in trance, entranced, entrance to beyond. Please play on in my core. Encore! Encore!

I lost my mind in a concert hall today.

The tears are a couple of days past. Only a few clouds still hang about. The sun is shining and the mid-day is warm. I am certain more rain will come but for now I have work to be done. I need to break the ground and plow under the manure that has been spread. I hoe my tough rows. I love the smell of fresh earth. It is dark, damp and so rich with gifts of life. It is the comforter on my bed of love. I plant the seeds. If there is no more rain, I irrigate. I pull the weeds and give my new crops tender and attentive care. I watch for the sprouts. There is the crocus that springs up when the spring is due. Other flowers come and the veggies too, in time.

For now, my harvest rests in its bed.

You are a gracious and generous lover. Your attention and gifts smother my sensibilities. I am cut off from the world of reason and of needs. I remember our love and forget the forms of worldliness. I make more rooms and clean storage spaces but it is not enough to contain or maintain your blessing of affection. I hope you understand that I must share your gifts with others. I accept what you present as presents. I unwrap and give them away.

Still there are more in my heart each day.

I found a dark place that gives me comfort in its absence of stimulation, substance and color. It is my Saturn space. I take refuge in its solitude and silence. It is not a place I would care to live. Still I enjoy these quiet visits. This space is mine alone, my alone box. I break off a piece of this charcoal to carry each day. It is essential in my pallet. My pictures are broad, full of color. But, there is no depth without the shadows.

I wander deep into the landscape of love.

What do I write? My page is one long blank line waiting for a reply. I stare into the darkness of another day. The sun slumbers in a bed a ways away. I hunger for love in a touch, a kiss. All the physical sensations I miss. My belly aches from heaving its dryness. I release the bowels of hurt and find emptiness. I break my fast in mourning fashion. The soggy grain is warm and sticks. My cereal is flavored with fruit from a godly garden. Fresh picked it is meaty. It crunches. It makes my food for the day sweet. I eat. I am full again.

When filled, the blank becomes love underlined.

My way is a curious country road that no one paused to pave. Faded tracks of forgone tread, resisting rampant rain. I wonder why the road is there, where could it possibly go? There is only one choice that will show me, the only way to know. I pack my sack and travel it. I dream of roads that take me somewhere. To a here I have never been. Spiraling up a mountain or stretching across a wide river bridge. My roads are paved only in short stretches. I get soaked as I ford the streams. Most often these passages are traces in dirt or grass. I can never travel the common path. In some unpredicted rhythm I am detoured and redirected to different destinations. I fold my itinerary into a flower and tie it to a tree. I release my understanding to be carried by the breeze. It is no longer useful information to me. Perhaps someone else will see it as beauty. On occasion there is a town or village that will let me rest, an honored guest. But it is not very long until I am renewed and I must be on with the quest for quiet nothingness. I avoid the ways marked with billboards that advertise happy developments, if you lived here, you'd be home. I more often take to the unmarked and overlooked, to know the unknown and experience the unknowable, to see but never own.

I write a travelogue of love.

A voice said within my inner ear, you might feel there is much you need to know. Many things to learn. Your soul self cries for direction, education and enlightenment. If you want to know from where the power comes? Follow the lines of love. If you want to find the way back home, simply step in the footprint love has left. If you need to remember who you truly are, go to the library of your heart. Your story is bound and waiting on the shelf. Look for a title called love. It is in the section on history, biography, philosophy, biology, mystery and true romance. Open the cover and read.

It comes in many editions, but it is never fiction.

Dressed in robes of religiosity, the Pharaoh, Minister, Paresis, Monk, Priest and Pharisee wanted to see for themselves. So together they walked into a bar. It had a wide door.

What is this, some sort of joke the bartender asked?

No! they replied in harmony. We hear you have a drink distilled from the divine vine.

But all I have to offer is simple water said the keeper of the bar.

We hear songs from this place carrying into the street. With our own eyes we see dancers in states of ecstasy. Can water do such a thing?

Well of course it can, if it is drawn from the spring of love answered the server. Other drinks burn as they sink to your belly. They in turn intoxicate the mind. This one lights your heart. Would you care for a sip?

One said, that sort of thing will never touch my lips. It is not refined or defined. It may be unclean another of the group spoke out.

They left together. Their sandals collecting mud from a stream beside the drinking house. Each found their way home, licking their lips from thirst.

I am drowned in a shot of love today.

Can you feel it in your heart? Something vibrates within my chest, a tuning fork, note of tenderness. Mine resonates with yours. I live inside a song that lives inside of me. It is a mirror inside a mirror stretching the length of a long hall, the long haul. It is a metaphor of love, a simile like passion. It is an ancient song, so very new. I learn it again and again. I never forget its melody, but it has so many verses. I am one of them. Another one is you. The lover is our chorus. Dance, sing and breathe within this epic ballad of love.

Perhaps a troubadour will sing our story.

I kicked and stretched to go deep, but my anchor in the surface held me back. My reason floating in the world of air for too long had kept me moving with the waves. When some ship would pass I'd be dizzied by the wake. I gnawed the rusty chain to what others call the sane, the sanitized sanity, inane. But I relaxed into my fate. The weight lifted away and I sank. I released my sense of up and down. I am lost, free to be a mermaid in the sea of divine devotion. Riding the currents of love's perfection, when you float, only here, only now count. I take no measure on the depths. I make no count of the deaths, the dying of my mind or the passed on time. I swim into the spinning, turning whirlpool of passion.

The sunken treasure is the pleasure of love.

It is the constant of the universe. Love plus love equals love, nothing more, never the less. The square root of love is love as is the sum of love squared. Love cannot be quantified. Love defies being tallied. There is no plus or minus, bottom line there is only love. There is no division in love. A fraction of love is love and love to the thousandth power is love. There is no change in the exchange rate, always love for love. It comes from an account that can't be overdrawn. Give it away and you have more than before. I have broken the lock on my heart. The vault is open. Please take all you want.

I am getting good at this math.

I am leaving believing behind, losing my mind and burning my learning. My head is an entrapment contraption. It wastes time struggling to find verbs or nouns to describe the inside, where words don't exist, such silliness. Music and dance are phonics in the heart's dialect. If I play you a song that moves you to dance, jumping and twirling in joy, would you mind? The gray matter is good but it is like a power line of wood. It looks great when polished to display its fine grains, but it can't carry this current. The energy fosters and feeds the friction. The knowing of here burns and smolders away.

I do not understand, but I dance in the light of love's fire.

I guess you don't notice until you need them. Rusty clogged gutters and blocked tear ducts were themes of the day. Sometimes lessons come that way. When things back up and can't flow away, major damage will result. The water can make itself difficult, seep in and wash away your foundation. Get up on the roof and clean the gutters before the storm, they are your protection. They are not storage trays for leaves or debris. They need to be free and open to the flow. Know the storms will come and go. Let tears easily leave your eyes. Feel the warmth on your cheek and in your soul.

Be ready to weather what ever a day brings.

I lived in an island asylum
Of self selected seclusion
Contemplating conjectures
Perfect lunacy
I did not perceive
The surrounding sea
Of love
Until my secure
Circular world
Was sunk

In some rarely remembered dream I let my soul fly. I stood on a cliff's edge. The gauze dress pressed to my skin by the wind. I leaned forward ready to fall to whatever becomes of the fallen. I didn't push. There was no jump or jerk, I just let the smooth motion leave the ground behind. I released expectations, knowing full well that this was an end. Night dies in the morning's light. I became the sunrise as I allowed my body and all that I am to rise in the sky.

I am leaning into love today.

Everything I live is a lesson or a blessing. And they are easy to distinguish, like telling soap from a desert dish. Each experience and encounter is the next look at the textbook of love. Until I fade into the nothing space that is everything.

When I am there, being is the blessing.

I was walking where they pile and burn the trash. I made a fine discovery, the scavenger that I am. My heart had been left in the dump, used up and discarded. I retrieved and revived it. I washed it in the river of fire. I am polishing it to a new shine. A thin brittle shell, my heart is such a fragile thing, until it fills. Then it is strong, solid, and transparent. It is not threatened by rough treatment. It can bear the weight. Arrows and blows of a careless word pass hardly noticed. The light within shines through the skin. It needs no walls of protection. I'll never let it be stolen again. I will keep it open. But I will always be at home in its warmth. I'll share all it has. It is an inn of rest and comfort.

If you get a chance, stop in.

There is a light about you tonight. You shine with the love of the lover. Your gentleness is an invitation to share the space of lovingness, a nest where mother broods. Break the shell. It is thin. Inside is aloneness and fragile security. Beyond is the universe. Shake out your feathers. Let them dry in the light. Behind your shimmering form I make out the outline of your wings. They are broad and strong, made to fly high. Unfold them, catch the wind, rise.

Walking here may seem awkward, but you are designed for much more.

Love is the quake that shakes and shifts my world. Reality changes its position and a passageway opens into another place. Tunnel vision, looking in it seems dream like, a figment formed from fantasy. I step though the portal pass and look back. The retro view is of a dream, a figment formed from fantastic fanaticism, a facade of realism.

I am channeled into the universe of passion.

I'll be darned. I am worn thin and ripped where the fabric is weakest. While some might throw me away, others see value. Darning is not a suture. Did you know darning is a reweaving of the garment, not just pulling the torn edges together? It appears someone or something is pulling a thread from the spool of the universe. As my grandmother did, they slide a light bulb inside for mending over its shape. The needle and yarn remake and fill the space. The hands of a master weaver renew me. No longer a make-do garment for those days when most others won't see.

I am pulled from the drawer for dances and celebrations.

What if each circle was a person?
Would they be as different as we are, individual, unique?
Do we value an Ivy League educated person over a blue-collar worker?
Do the songs of field laborers have merit?
Is a grand choir more important because it is larger or more precise?
Perhaps each is different and valued in its own way within its own universe.
Would a chickadee devalue the honk of a goose?
Does the woodpecker, with his rhythm, hold disdain for the caw of the crow?
Let each one be.
Let each one have its voice.
Let each evolve and rise into its space.
Let each live, grow and love
in joy,
enjoy.

It was a waking dream, a vision. I stepped onto a ship as it pushes away from shore. As I observed, the home I had known became a shrinking form. I watched the wake make its way across the choppy waters between the past and me. They revealed no comprehension of where I was to go. Turnaround a voice said. If you want to understand don't look behind, look ahead. The captain was a smiley loving chap. He gestured for me to stand beside him and put a hand on the wheel. Together we are adventuring the endless sea within. Watching for another world and new life rising across the horizon.

We sail on.

Begin with love. End with love
Fill the in between with love
Love is all there is

Love is all there is to be
Knowing love is knowledge, warmth and peace

Born in love. Die in love
Fill the in between with love
Love is all there is

Sharing love is kindness
Living love is wisdom. Feeling love is joyful bliss

Awake with love. Rest with love
Fill the in between with love
Love is all there is

Love is all there is

I adventure through a wild and undeveloped realm. Breaking brush and pushing aside the tall grass. It is not the major beasts that hinder me. It is the smallest annoyances holding me back with their bite. My effort is spent removing the ticks of time. I gather so many on my path through the woods. I am scratching to release the blood-sucking pest. To time, I am just a passer by, a traveling feast. Perhaps some day I'll find the place where time cannot survive and does not thrive.

I am spraying the pesticide of meditation all over my being.

Live the lightning love that lights the fire of passion. Even with a powerful strike, it is an ancient timber requiring time to bring to full blaze. Kindle it with kindness. When in flamed, it flares hot and long. The fireplace within longs to be filled with the flames and smudged with smoke. Let the aroma of the burning fill your house. Throw in all the old things for which the need has passed. Let your tears sizzle into steam and dissipate up the chimney.

Join hands with your shadow and dance.

Your music touches my soul, makes it move and feel whole.

Then my heart makes new music.

Your love touches my soul, makes it move and feel whole.

Then my heart becomes an amplifier.

Love is very loud today.

Have you been told? Do you know? You are the one. You bring light into shadowy corners. You reach where another may never go. Did you know you are the anointed one? Each of us is the one to someone. You may be the only smile they see today or the only kind word this week. Their smile is the mirror where your love primps. Make it look good today. To that someone, you are the chosen one. Many of the names are not exchanged. They are faces fading in the night. Still you are their miracle, just because you are here.

Today, you are the enlightened one to me.

I discovered love is fun. I am jumping and bouncing on my bed. I laugh in love because it tickles the inside of me, makes me feel and act so silly. People think I have been told a good joke. I bend, twist and slap my knee. I sing senseless songs very loudly. I spin in circles and dance to unheard music. It is the liqueur of love that makes me feel this happiness, the billowing cloud of bliss, and a drunk that laughs at everything.

The punch line of every story is love.

The clouds and tears have passed. We gather in the sunshine. Our feet make brushstrokes of dance. With the pallet of mystic colors, our songs paint rainbows. Our hearts are canvases filled with beauty, brilliant light and vibration.

I love fresh air after a good rain.

It was just a day at the beach. The waves break with force but sooth with their rhythm. I carry the sound home in a drum. I saw love in a one-tooth grin. Beautiful music comes from a six-string guitar that has only three strings. I heard joy in the blues. I walked the miles of scents and accents. People come in so many shapes, like snowflakes that never melt. I watched moving statues. Were they the show or are they my audience? I watched a metal ball float across sculpted ripples of muscle. I felt comfort in a circle of friends. The gulls swarm for a bit of crust. Like the rainbow colored kite the colors of my mood flap and rise high on the ocean wind.

I learned that it isn't about amount, it is what you do with it that counts.

It was rumored that the heavens were come to earth and love to sing and play. So I went for a walk today. There is a street where beauty lives. It is lined with strong, tall trees. I heard singing. Someone had opened a window. I could not see the source, but I recognized the voice. It was an angel with a soulful song. My lover said to let my heart listen. Every lyric is a history lesson. The journey is in the learning, not the destination. Honor all that makes us real. Each day is valued for the treasure it once concealed but now reveals. Enlightenment may come in many different ways. We are spirits come to learn humanness. The lover's love is all, in all. Wherever it goes, there it is.

It always finds you there.

I have decided that I need to play today. This love is too important to be taken seriously. When you make a game the rules change. Reality moves far away. The fun of the moment surpasses the weight of the world on this scale. Worries are flesh that pass into dust just when we move into the other space. And this world is already such a dusty place.

I'll not wait till I am gone to be here.

As the day begins I look to the sky. The weather is changing. A high-pressure system is moving in. At times like this it never rains. Perhaps the tear soaked clothes will have time to dry. It may be a head and heart inversion that hangs in the air for weeks. That is when the brain thinks in emotions and the heart knows the wisdom and reasons. Perhaps I can get naked in the warmth. My soul needs a no line tan.

By osmosis, I am filled with love.

Walking within the light is such an odd thing. In the land I travel there are few markers on the path or road maps. I do remember a sign that said nowhere was near. All the lanes are hilly or lined with trees and flowers that prevent a clear view. The surrounding beauty obstructs my vision of the future. I ask directions but can't quite explain where I want to go. I accept the need to roam. I can't tell you the place I am going, except that it is home.

Home is where I find my heart or is my heart where I find home?

The heart's contemplation confounds the mind. I fell into a bucket of newfound love and am spun around and around until I am solid in this space. Ancient passion made fresh each day. The universe has impeccable taste. Today it wants ice cream. The touch melts my frozen sweetness.

I am licked to the bottom of my cone.

I am spending my life searching for air. My body craves it. I have been told that I can't live without it. How can I look for what I cannot see? And that which I can see I do not want. It is such an odd quest upon which to be put. Still I put all else aside until I find it. I am tired from this restless endless searching. I am lucky I have not been assigned to look for God. How hard would that be?

I think I'll sit here and catch my breath.

I walked away from love, but it followed me. Am I leaving a trail of crumbs? Everywhere I go it is there. I close the door but there is no lock. Some guest comes through and leaves it ajar. Then love enters at will. It sits down in front of me. It takes my heart without asking. This love is such a mooch.

I can't stop myself from petting it.

You are the earthen clay from which I am formed. There is no separate part. I am spun and shaped with a masterful touch. The dizziness is delightful bliss. Then I'm set in the kiln. Such a fire does this work. I am glazed to a deep shine, all to fill me with sweet spring water. Here comes the jug.

I love the sound your breath makes blowing across my lip.

As the night air cools fog rises. At first I feel it at my feet. Finally I am completely immersed in a bridal veil. The lights are transformed to translucent globes. My entire world is close. With a love lantern, I search for my beloved. I know one day the veil will lift and I will feel the lips of joy and bliss. The sun rises and melts the mist. My unveiled vision is broad and deep. I see the globes were beings of light. They fill the universe of beauty that has always surrounded me.

I see you.

My pain and I had a game of tag, then patty cake. After that we jumped rope. She loves to play at my place. Now we are playing hide and seek. Pain always finds me when I try to hide. So now it is my turn to do the seeking. Where did hurt go? "Hello hurt, I will find you" is what I say. But I can't be sincere about such a silly thing. This game bores me. I think I'll just go to sleep. Lets see how long she can hide.

Tomorrow we will play, maybe not.

I live in a sensational world. Looking through the eyes of love I find a wealth of beauty and understand value. With ears of affection I follow the music swirling around me, such a dance. Lips part and my tongue tastes robust sweetness. I reach with tenderness and fondled softness. Like fresh mud, love oozes between toes as I step. Flesh tingles and pulls into tiny bumps. I jolt with the bolt of love. I can't count one before my heart makes thunder. It strikes close to where I live. I breathe hard and deep. I get it.

This love makes senses.

Argue with a fool and your opponent does too.
I told the universe I had nothing to say.
It replied. That's right. So say it.
But I can't say nothing. If I speak it is something.
O. K., so then say something.
But nothing is not something and just something is not anything.
All right, then say that.
But that is not something either and it is not nothing and it not really anything.
There is nothing that is love.
Yet, love is everything.
That is something.
Just say love.
Love

I hunt for love. It sneaked by my place last night. I leave the security of home following the tracks, the great hunter that I am. I must be smarter than this thing. Love is sloppy. It always leaves a trail. But it squeezes between tight places where it is hard for me to go. It climbs straight up a cliff without a foothold. And it goes down so many holes. I find a nest, but it is not home. I glimpse a shadow's pass. I turn to see just a shaking leaf. I go back a different way. I am deep in the woods with no sense of direction. I am turning in on the spiral love makes. I rest on a stump. Thump!

I am caught within its trap.

What was life is now death and what was death is now life. I was not born to learn living. I am given form to find dying. The life cycle is running in reverse. My body ages, but my soul prepares for birth. I will not live till I die. Rather I die till I live. Surrendering to senseless existence is the purpose that means everything. This insanity is the only sane thing my heart can contrive. I am consumed by the kiss that leads to consummation, transformation.

Within an enraptured encounter I am conceived by ecstatic love.

Because of you I am lit by passion. I jump to life, a flame dancing in the fireplace of love. Logs of songs are the fuels of ecstasy. Light and warmth radiate as my smoky spirit ascends to the heavens.

I hope you have a large woodpile.

To the songbirds, the substance in which they fly is love. They are unaware of air, they simply are. They live where they live, surrounded and carried by love. It is not ignorance to simply exist and let the love lift you up. Knowing how to fly is more important than knowing why. They speak no names. They never sing I am in love today. Still, every note is love. The song touches and connects all that exists. The all responds with gratitude. As I am lifted into love today, I sing.

I live where I live, surrounded and carried by love.

I am removed from the things that I might be. I am a caterpillar dreaming of butterflies. I crawl along a limb and visualize a life of flight. Contemplation on transformation is an obscure frustration. It defies my comprehension to surpass my apprehension of change. My life is too real for such fanciful fantasy. I have crawled for hours to reach this very leaf. I am justified in pride to have accomplished such a feat. I marvel at the beauty from this perch of perception. What more could one hope to be? I look out across the woods at places I need not go. Though I wonder at the floral colors far below. Who could care about such things? I surrender to my fate, my place in this world. I can only accomplish the chores of today. I release the understanding of the things that I do. Tomorrow will be what it has to be, another today.

I let the questions rest as I weave my cocoon.

You are an instrument of love.
I love the music that you make.
There is a song to be made today.
Would you join me in this labor?
A heavy heart is seeking relief.
Would you join me in this work?
A whole note in the divine scale.
The world sways with the sound.
You are an instrument of love.
I love the music that you make.
Perfect pitch for soul perfection.
Make the melody sound sweet.
You are an instrument of love.
I love the music that you make.
Become the rhythm of release.
Play in time to the heartbeat.
You are an instrument of love.
I love the music that you make.
Join the orchestra of ecstasy.
Be the resonance of harmony.
You are an instrument of love.
I love the music that you make.
The world needs your song today.
Would you join me in this labor?
A song brings hearts to their feet.
Would you join me in this work?
You are an instrument of love.
I love the music that you make.

I can dance to it.

Opening the wrapping of my heart I discover a bottomless box. I reach for the end within. All the walls appear to disappear. I am lost in a new universe. Is there no limit to this insanity or is this sanity beyond limits? I will be present in the day. I will dance through this space. Living to love means loving to live.

Today is a present and I will love the love it gives.

May I bother you? It will only take a moment. I promise. It is not really my place, none of my business exactly. I am not the prudish sort so I find it no trouble for you to be so exposed, although most people would keep such a thing underneath. I think its chic. I guess I could let it be, you will notice in time, or at least I hope so. Still I thought you should know, just be aware. I am truly sorry if it made me stare, but your love is showing.

Perhaps it will start a new trend.

The ears of the divine tingle and are tickled by song. The feet of the one that loves move. We join in an embrace of passion. Is this what they call dirty dancing? The friction of our connection makes more heat than a desert day. We melt together into one puddle. We evaporate into the clouds. The lightening and thunder are the sounds of our lovemaking.

It looks like rain today.

I had a friend that revealed love. It was someone with the power to blow apart the tomb, my heart. The action let the specters escape. The dead should not be confined in a shrine but released to find peace. I evicted those that would not go on their own. Then I gazed into the deepening darkness of an upside down hole. At the top was a spark of light. Problem was the top was where a bottom should be. Crawling down was climbing up and coming in was going out. I intrude in a new realm. I realize love had not been locked out. I had been locked in.

Everyone should have such a friend.

Some people feel the universe should fit between their ears, not me. I wouldn't want to live in such a tiny place. The head is hard, holds only so much. Cram it too full and it cracks. The soul is soft and expands with love. It can be larger inside than it is without. The more love you pour in, the larger it gets. I open a drain, but more flows in than I can let out.

I have walked about for weeks and cannot reach the wall.

Fill your life with beauty. Permit it to crowd you as it permeates you with awe. Let it be so close you can barely breathe. Marvel at intricate detail. Gasp at the way it feels. Evoke joy, tears or laughter, each in a unique way. How you see it is how the universe sees you. Perhaps you will understand it is the mirror of your soul.

You are beauty in my world.

I take my love
From it's closet
Dress my best
For today my
Destination is a dance
Where an angel sings
Such a sound that
Reason resonates to
The point of cracking
Like a long stem glass
It becomes a bell bath
That leaves a ring
In my head
Enthralled with
An ethereal melody
The trance captures
My consciousness
Blindfolds my seeing
Of ordinary being
Spins me around
Within the sound
I feel I will fall
But find I float
As I hold the hand
Of my love

It is just an everyday thing

Love is leveling the landscape of my life. It is building me a home. It appears, so I hear, it likes the scenery here. The plans are for quite a development. There are trees for shadowy shade in the sultry summer days. There is a recess for solitude, a place to ponder by a reflecting pond. There are glorious halls for neighborhood gatherings. I gather the dances are divine. There is a park with a pool and a good school too. I think I may retire here.

I am happy to have you as a neighbor.

Colors dance waving scarves
Flowing hue and shades
As they draw close I observe
The merger into one globe
Where they meet
The world is brighter.

Getting to know you is a brilliant idea.

Strike a match
Start love's fire
Let it burn
Let it sear
Burn the old
In love flames
Let it scorch
Let it char
Fire is light
In dim worlds
Let it glow
Let it beam
Let love shine
Darkness melts
Let it go
Up in smoke

Locals know it
A restaurant
Of distinction

Come in

Aromas rise
To tantalize
Your hungry heart

Just now

Anticipation
Growing craving
To satisfy

The need

Service is ready
Table's Waiting
Reserved for love

Let's eat

I wear a ball gown because
I am invited to a gala
As I draw near the hall is filled
With music and movement
Voices sing verses
Of the lyrics of love
My lover lingers at the door
Waiting

As I make my way in
We touch and turn in tenderness
Moving with the melody
Roaming from room to room
Then pass through the garden gate
Senses awake to the colors and scents
Of ecstasy

This dance is my daily delight

There are some things I have learned.
I discovered where to find the divine glowing presence of the one that is all. It is right here. However timing is important. You must know when to be here. It is right now. Tomorrow, yesterday, later and before exist only in your mind. If you desire to experience something beyond your self, look around. All that exists is here, just now. When I need: to feel the essence, see the embodiment, be enlightened by the illumination of heaven, I look at you.

You make me smile.

The sun comes in without knocking. Quietly slipping back my quilted night and warmly caressing my cheek. The softest of touches, nearly a tickle, a finger traces to my ear and down my neck. It arouses me with a kiss and a whisper. A familiar feeling, I know this glow. My body arches, rises and readies for a day of rapture.

I am awakened to love.

Your eyes draw me to an ocean
Meditating on a pristine beach
Hearing gentle rhythms
Gulls singing off beat
I don't mind

I am awed by the vastness
More than I can know
I let the breaker take me
Pulled by the undertow
I don't mind

The force releases me
Miles from where I began
There is no shore of security
No place for me to stand
I don't mind

I emerge as a tear
Dripping down my face
Again in this reality
In my ordinary place
I don't mind

Because I drowned my mind in love

Is it right to loiter in a holy space? Do you mind if I linger here? I am gripped by loveliness, filled with contentment. I am free to leave, but feel the need for this comfort. Today I am nothing more than a lazy cat lying in a pool of sunlight.
If you pet me, I'll purr.

A lesson, I am learning that love is all that matters.
Everything else is just dust in the making.
Love is here, now and forever.
I am on a reducing plan.
Love is all that is
Love is all
Love is
Love

Delusions of divinity,
My ego thinks it is a messiah.
In its misplaced arrogance,
It wants to save my soul.
It parades its cross,
Making disruptive ruckus.
It has been nailed down,
Crucified and buried
But it comes back to life, again.
I understand the need.
I must change my plan
Perhaps I can transfigure it.
Convince it to ascend.
Heaven is not a place we go.
It is where we are,
When the self has gone.

Patterns of light prance on the river's rippled skin. I am awed at the wisdom in its wrinkles. Beside the river, strands of silk prisms stretch through the grass. Here too, the sunlight dances. As my mind becomes placid, my spirit spins. Behind the lids of my eyes I sway to the movement. Each tiny wave rises and falls across me. Each string of brilliance is connected to my being. Within my within I become a landscape where love crafts patterns of beauty and movement. This is my sacred place